Letters

How Our Siblings Shape Us

With all due respect to nurturing parents everywhere, new research on family dynamics reveals that siblings have a potent influence on personality development. Our report brought poignant reflection from readers on how the presence--or absence--of siblings leaves an indelible mark

Your report on sibling relationships resonated with me [July 10]. I'm the middle child, between two brothers, and I have always been affected by my relationship with them. We grew up close, and now we are in touch each week. In times of discord, I don't like to go away angry at either of them. As my brothers and I have always said, "We can't stay mad at one another for more than an hour. We're family."

CATHRYN BIGA

Chicago

Siblings make us who we are. What has always seemed like common sense has finally been confirmed by scientific research. When I was preparing the dreaded tell-us-about-yourself essay for college applications last year, I submitted a draft to satisfy a class assignment, and my teacher told me that I had written a great essay--about my brother. It's hard to describe who you are only in terms of yourself when the people you've grown up with are the ones who made you that way.

STACY LEE

Northridge, Calif.

To say that "siblings make you who you are" is simplistic nonsense. Our development is influenced by parents, grandparents, distant forebears, teachers --and on and on, ad infinitum. All the people we encounter make up a complex community that shapes each one of us.

JOHN R. THURSTON

Eau Claire, Wis.

The article did not mention what the loss of a sibling can do to those who are left behind. When my elder sister died suddenly, the effect was devastating. Losing your only sibling is much like losing half of yourself. If you lose your parents, you are an orphan; if you lose your spouse, you are a widow; but there is no term to describe a sibling who becomes an only child because of a cruel twist of fate.

KRISTIN MOSES MURRAY

Charlottesville, Va.

Can Gitmo Be Fixed?

The reports about the treatment of suspected terrorists at Guantanamo Bay are disturbing [July 10]. Restraining a person in order to force-feed him via a nasogastric tube is revolting. As a doctor, I am shocked that our government engages in this abuse; as a Muslim, I am frightened that presumed religious fundamentalists have been so psychologically and physically tortured that they have tried to kill themselves (suicide, according to Islam, sends one straight to hell); and as a U.S. citizen, I find it morally unacceptable that inhuman acts are committed in our country's name.

SALEM SAMRA, M.D.

New Haven, Conn.

The detentions at Gitmo are immoral, illegal by international standards and profoundly un-American. It's time to shut down this abomination before we create even more enemies than we already have. We should try the detainees we can't immediately clear, punish the ones we convict and promptly release the rest. Any possibility of extracting useful intelligence from the detainees passed years ago.

KEN KEATON

Lauderhill, Fla.

Liberty vs. Security

Everyone should read managing editor Richard Stengel's "To Our Readers" column about the crossfire between the government and the press over the stories on the highly classified program to monitor bank records [July 10]. It was refreshing, in this era of knee-jerk vilification of the other guy's point of view, for Stengel to urge us to listen carefully to the debate, since power politics may play a role on both sides. As he reminded us, we are the judges.

AUDREY MAYVILLE

Winston-Salem, N.C.

The press might have less difficulty withholding the details of ongoing national-security programs if it were not distracted by the grandiose notion that it must "speak truth to power." A better objective would be to provide accurate and useful information. That may not sound as exciting, but it is a clearer conception of what the public needs.

CLAY BOSWELL

New York City

When a government official leaks classified information, it is a crime, and the person should be tried and, if found guilty, punished. Journalists should be held accountable if they aid and abet in the crime. The natural conflict between the government and the press should be resolved by the Legislative and Judicial branches. It would benefit our society to have these cases taken to court. Nobody has the right to reveal sensitive information that has the potential to threaten our national security.

PETER SMITH

Castle Rock, Colo.

I trust the government more than I trust the media these days. What might keep journalists from getting too full of themselves? The sight of a few leakers, reporters and editors defending themselves against formal charges of treason might do the trick.

GARY L. PARRY

Carrollton, Texas

Going into Gaza

"Search & Destroy" [July 10], on Israel's raid against Hamas during the search for a kidnapped soldier, stated that "Gaza militants have fired homemade rockets at Israeli towns, usually missing but causing some injuries and great misery." Women and children have been injured and killed by the shelling. To call that "great misery" is a bit understated. As an Israeli living in the San Francisco Bay Area, I wonder how the San Jose police department would react if people in its southern neighborhoods fired missiles at its northern ones. Obviously the Gaza situation is different, but if the Palestinian authorities wish to have full control of their territories, they should act responsibly, the same as any modern country would: by capturing and punishing criminals and other types of evildoers.

EYAL TRAITEL

Cupertino, Calif.

History Lessons

Columnist Charles Krauthammer's Essay "Remember What Happened Here" [July 10] hit the nail on the head: Palestinians remain committed to the destruction of Israel. As soon as they had control of Gaza, they vandalized synagogues, destroyed state-of-the-art greenhouses and did nothing to create jobs and income. If Palestinians hadn't been warring against Israel during the past 58 years, they would have made economic progress. Palestinians deserve leaders who are committed to raising their standard of living, not destroying it.

JOSEPH ABDEL WAHED

Moraga, Calif.

Krauthammer described Gaza as free: "Every remnant of Israeli occupation was uprooted and taken away." But prior to the latest incursion, Gaza was still surrounded by the Israeli army, with checkpoints at exits, its coast patrolled and its airspace controlled. It is actually a large open-air prison. Israel's occupation of territory beyond its legitimate borders is the problem.

GILWEE WALKER

Palo Alto, Calif.