Eat Beef--Just Ignore the Song

By Lisa McLaughlin

Advertisers are using hit songs to flog everything from Cadillacs to contraception. But are all those peppy tunes really as upbeat as they sound in the ads? Here's a look at some of the lyrics Madison Avenue left on the cutting-room floor:

o BOSTON MARKET To launch its new beef offerings, the restaurant chain is using the Rev. Horton Heat's psychobilly standard Eat Steak: "Eat beef, eat beef, it's a mighty good food." Considerably less appetizing is the verse that gets omitted: "Look at all the cows in the slaughterhouse yard/ Gotta hit 'em in the head, gotta hit 'em real hard/ First you gotta clean 'em, then the butcher cuts 'em up/ Throws it on a scale, throws an eyeball in a cup."

o ROYAL CARIBBEAN CRUISES The pumping beat of Iggy Pop's Lust for Life might seem well suited for the fun-loving, rock wall--climbing tourists in the cruise line's TV commercials. But the original song is a tale of a heroin addict: "With the liquor and drugs/ And a flesh machine/ He's gonna do another striptease."

o TARGET The retailer is sending kids back to school with a G-rated rewrite of Sir Mix-a-Lot's raunchy rap Baby Got Back--cutely remade as "Baby Got Back ... Pack." The original isn't so kid-friendly: "So ladies if the butt is round/ And you wanna triple X throw down/ Dial 1-900-MIXALOT and kick them nasty thoughts."

o ORTHO TRI-CYCLEN LO This birth-control ad uses There She Goes as covered by Sixpence None the Richer. The song, first performed by the La's, has long been rumored to be about heroin. Among the missing lyrics: "She calls my name, pulls my train/ And no-one else can heal my pain." --By Lisa McLaughlin