WELCOME ABOARD--OR PAY UP, SIT UP AND SHUT UP

By Stacy Perman

How ugly is it getting up there? Real ugly: American Airlines says the reported number of incidents of verbal and physical abuse of crew members in 1995--900--was nearly triple that of 1994. Other carriers report similar increases, the result no doubt of more agitation on the ground and in the air. We hate to fly, and it shows. "It's absolutely gotten worse," says frequent traveler Heidi Weisman, 32, of Los Angeles. "I expect lots of waiting, pushing, shoving and uncomfortable seats. I can't remember the last time I was comfortable."

While these are the best of times for airline companies--rising stock prices and record profits--the opposite is true for passengers. In most service industries, the customer comes first. But because of the nature of airlines--huge, expensive jets whose fixed costs can't be adjusted for demand--a peculiar paradox emerges. "The policies and procedures at the major airlines are geared to produce a system that meets the needs of the airline and not the customer," says Michael Boyd, an aviation consultant in Golden, Colorado.

Blame it on deregulation. The free-for-all in the skies that began in 1978 democratized travel and lowered fares--that's the good part. The bad part is that the industry has become a commodity business that serves millions of passengers a year but treats them like pork bellies. "Service appears to be declining over time," says Steven Casley, principal at Back Associates, an aviation consultancy in Stamford, Connecticut. "What's driving that is deregulation: cost cutting, fewer employees, fewer amenities and fewer services."

While airline marketers weave illusions of high-altitude happiness, the suits on the ground are slashing costs. First to go are the so-called amenities that would enhance the passenger's ride. According to Back Associates, airlines spent just 7.84% of overall expenses on passenger services in 1996, down from 9.45% in 1987. Enjoy the pretzels. Here's what else you can look forward to:

--Fewer Nonstops. The hub-and-spoke system was created in the late 1970s and early '80s to create "fortress hubs" and full planes. For passengers, this means fewer nonstop flights, reduced meals and higher fares. The strategy faltered when low-fare carriers landed in the hubs and ticket prices dropped exponentially. But the ValuJet tragedy has devastated the low-cost carriers. When ValuJet recently announced plans to end service between Mobile, Alabama, and Atlanta (a Delta fortress hub), the lowest available fare on Delta shot up overnight from $58 to $404.

--Food. It's a toss-up (oops, wrong word) whether getting a meal is good or bad--but now even cross-country travelers can find themselves going hungry. First the airlines removed the flavor from chicken a la king, then they jettisoned the chicken altogether. Between 1992 and 1995 the airlines shaved $368 million off costs by cutting meal service, according to the Airport Transport Association. A few years ago, American found that removing a single olive per salad could save $100,000. "My wife and I bring our own food on board," says Martin Deutsch, editor at large for Travel Agent magazine. "Even on first class."

--Seats. The discomfort felt in your belly is exceeded only by the pain in your behind. Domestic carriers are flying at an average 70% capacity, the highest since World War II. But legroom, as measured by the distance between the seat in front of you and the back of your own, has shrunk from 34 in. in coach 20 years ago to an average of 31 in. today. Doesn't sound like much, but remember that the trend in human girth is running opposite: Americans are getting bigger. The cush has been taken out of the cushions too, from 4 in. to 1/2 in., in order to make room for--ahem--more seats. "Transportation is now mass transit," says consultant Boyd. "Consumers are held captive. Travel isn't elegant anymore."

--Attitude. While airline personnel commit untold acts of kindness, the pressure of more work for relatively less pay is telling. After her flight was delayed for 7 1/2 hours (five of which passengers were held on board), a publicist from Orlando, Florida, was particularly irritated by the hostile attitude of the crew. "When you travel, you have to roll with it," she says. "But they were miserable, so they were going to make everyone miserable." Mission accomplished.

With the economy healthy, travel booming and airlines' profits surging, the industry is less likely to bring back the frills. "The quality of the experience has declined over time," says Deutsch. "The airlines have the upper hand. And I don't see it changing in the near future." So fasten your seat belts, folks--it's going to be a bumpy flight.