Sequels Aren't Equals

By RICHARD CORLISS

If you come, they will rebuild it. This movie law is founded on the success of sequels over the past two decades. From The Godfather, Part II through the multipart triumphs of Luke Skywalker, Indiana Jones, Rocky and Rambo, cops and aliens, Hollywood made big money by providing further adventures and more of the same.

This year, though, the golden rule seems tarnished. It's not that there's anything new in movies, heaven knows; the studios are serving up action, romance and comedy with the usual bland vigor. But so far, not one of 1993's top 20 hits is a spin-off. If the trend continues, sequelmania could become sequelphobia, and movie folk might have to dream up new characters and stories. Even new titles, not just old numerals. Catastrophe!

Or business could return to normal, as follow-ups to three popular comedies of 1992 come to market. Sister Act ($140 million at the North American box office), Wayne's World ($122 million) and Beethoven ($57 million) tickled audiences with humor that stretched all the way -- about a foot and a half -- from sitcoms to Saturday Night Live. The SNL-bred Wayne's World was agreeably hip, loose and clever, as befits smart guys acting goofy. But the other two films were hapless rehashes of working-girl and family themes done to death by the networks.

In action sequels, the hero is usually made to do the same muscular things to new bad guys in a different location. In comedies, characters mostly stay put: in the convent, the doghouse or Aurora, Illinois. The "new" plot (e.g., Wayne tries to stage a concert) would not tax a 30-minute TV comedy. These sequels are not so much extensions of the original as they are dupes, with the tiniest tweaks of gags and attitude; this time, in Sister Act 2: Back in the Habit, the nuns do a rap number in addition to '60s Motown. These films are also "family" pictures, which means they bear a message -- though the message can be severe in the Home Alone '90s. Beethoven's 2nd teaches that if you mess with a pooch and his humans, you can get creamed by a house, dropped off a cliff or neutered. Ah, the new family values!

On the Please-O-Meter, WW2 scores high, though one wonders whether kids will remember Wayne and Garth from two fads back, before Ren and Stimpy and Beavis and Butt-head. The other new comedies need never worry about fashion; B2 and SA2 are timelessly terrible. Perhaps, next time, the nuns and the St. Bernard should team up -- for Dog Act. And maybe someone could explain why moviegoers pay good money to watch inferior TV on the big screen. It's enough to give sequels a bad name.

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CREDIT: NO CREDIT

CAPTION: TAKE TWO -- NOT!