No Creeps Allowed In This Campaign

By Guy Garcia

While the rest of the Administration worries about Scuds and tanks, a few of George Bush's advisers have turned their attention to the weighty matter of what to call the President's re-election effort. The straightforward CREEP (Committee to Re-Elect the President) will simply not do: too many associations with the tainted Nixon and Watergate years. Other possibilities discussed, albeit none very seriously:

CRAB (The Committee to Re-Anoint Bush). Considered too regal and, uh, pinched.

REBAQ (Re-Elect Bush and Quayle). Main drawback: sounds like an aerobics shoe.

PREC (The President's Re-Election Committee). Not regal enough. Also, invites mispronunciation and ridicule.

REB (Re-Elect Bush). A potential winner. Pithy and easy to remember. Could have appeal among Southern whites . . .

With reporting by Sidney Urquhart