Headstrong and impulsive, Aries are likely to race across lawns and trample KEEP OFF THE GRASS signs. Geminis bark a lot. Libras sniff inquisitively under tables and into closets. Leos chase animals while Scorpios pester for second helpings. And if that doesn't sound like your sign of the zodiac, not to worry. Seer Jeane Dixon, famous and wealthy from casting people, has now gone to the dogs. "Dogs, after all," insists Dixon in her new book, Horoscopes for Dogs, "live under the same stars that we do." Take her Teddy, a mutt of indiscriminate breed. Dixon obviously doesn't know his birthday or his sign. But since Teddy loves to chase rabbits during walks through the woods, "he just has to be a Leo."

Until now Henry Irwin, 62, a West Pointer and former lieutenant colonel who resigned from the Army in 1947 after marrying Phillips Petroleum Heiress Elizabeth Phillips, was best known as a maverick Oklahoma presidential elector. In 1960 he ignored his pledge to Richard Nixon and voted for Virginia Senator Harry Byrd. Last week a court approved a settlement in which Irwin will be paid $1,600 a month by his exwife, as long as he remains unmarried. She herself had proposed a payment because of his lack of income. "It was just something I wanted to do," she told newsmen. Nevertheless, the settlement occurred only two months after the U.S. Supreme Court, in Orr vs. Orr, ruled that husbands could collect alimony. "This is the beginning of a trend," said Irwin's lawyer.

Who's afraid of the big bad monkfish? Certainly not Julia Child, that indefatigable doyenne of the television kitchen, even though the monkfish, or Lophius americanus, is such an ugly American that fish stores ordinarily chop off its fanged foot-wide head before they display the fish in order not to frighten customers. Taping a cooking session for the new season, Child hauled the fish up by its tail, showed the camera its "skin that moves around" and praised its "marvelous teeth--top, bottom and middle." "It is firm, lean and gelatinous," she insisted, "and very good in bouillabaisse." When it's mixed with lobster, "the lobster flavor penetrates the monkfish, and you think you're eating only lobster." Besides, Child pointed out, in these days of ballooning prices, monkfish is $1.89 per lb.

He was obviously 1 not quite fit as a fiedler, but nobody in Boston's packed Symphony Hall had expected him to be. For one thing, the Hub's beloved grouch and historic landmark, white-thatched Conductor Arthur Fiedler, 84, was climbing the podium to commence his 50th season as leader of the Boston Pops. More, Fiedler scarcely five months earlier had undergone massive brain surgery. The years and fears showed mainly in the fit of his bib: Fiedler ill had lost so much weight that Wife Ellen insisted on smaller tails from Brooks Brothers. Otherwise, things Pops-wise were the same, including a familiar hand-clapping, balloon-rising Stars and Stripes Forever finale.

It was a Washington week in which all kidding was not aside. While President Jimmy Carter was welcoming Japanese Premier Masayoshi Ohira to the White House, for instance, little maids from various schools, including First Daughter Amy, mounted excerpts from Gilbert and Sullivan's The Mikado, with its lighthearted attacks on both monarchy and things Japanese. Others in a cast of tens were Emily Powell, daughter of the President's press secretary, Senate siblings, ambassadorial ingenues, and Alice Jay, whose grandfather, James Callaghan, was in the process of losing his prime ministership at show time. Their ensemble was joined by another from the Soviet embassy, including Katya Dobrynin, the ambassador's granddaughter, who enchanted the East-West audience with her folk dance. Forgetting their handles, the kids had fun.

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