The Droll Dote

In his 16 years on Capitol Hill, Robert Dole has become known as one of the wittiest Republicans. His humor consists mainly of biting quips on a variety of subjects--often his own party.

On learning that Nixon had taped all his White House conversations: "Thank goodness whenever I was in the Oval Office, I only nodded."

On Nixon's offer of campaign help in 1974: "I haven't invited him to stump for me, but I wouldn't mind if Nixon flew over the state."

On authoring amendments: "In 1971 I introduced a resolution which Senator J. William Fulbright claimed he had already sponsored. 'Stealing a man's amendment is like stealing his cow,' Fulbright complained. But I reminded him that it was National Dairy Week and I would never steal a man's cow during National Dairy Week. 'I just milked it a little,'I admitted."

On Government spending: "My home-town newspaper, the Russell Record, once reported on a conscientious Congressman who kept having a recurrent nightmare in which he dreams that all the money he is spending is his own."

On being a Republican: "A Republican has to have a sense of humor because there are so few of us."

On his last name: "I'm not a household word except in Hawaii ... Dole is a four-letter word you can get used to."

On the presidency (in 1972): "When the President has a view and I have a view, we compromise and adopt his."

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