Let Them Eat Cake. In Bernalillo, N.Mex., blaming county officials for denying him funds and local grocers for refusing him credit, Sheriff Dick Montoya announced that he had no food to feed his prisoners, released all five inmates of the Sandoval County jail.

Sneak Preview. In St. Louis, a movie theater advertised an "action-packed" double feature: Hellfire and Brimstone.

Gratitude. In Tucson, Ariz., provided with shelter, warm food, and a new coat by the Salvation Army, Charles Demitus, 35, got a new start in life by robbing the Army's local headquarters and cashing $53 in forged Salvation Army checks.

Power of the Press. In Rushville, Neb., the Sheridan County Star reported: "Mayor Hank Jansen has instructed Police Chief Lester Jensen to give no tickets for any traffic violation," three weeks later reported that its editor, Phil Gottschalk, had been fined $1 and costs for improper parking.

The Real Collateral. In Comfort, Texas, after Bank President L. F. Goforth turned down his request for a $2,500 business loan, the applicant started to leave, changed his mind, brandished a revolver and escaped with $1,730.

Encore. In Kansas City, Kans., released from Leavenworth Penitentiary after serving a three-year term for auto theft, Edward H. Diller spotted a shiny yellow convertible, drove it off, 48 hours later was arrested and sentenced to a year and a day at Leavenworth, for auto theft.

Ties That Bind. In Pittsburgh, Parole Violator Myron Young, 27, left his wife Margaret, begged police to ship him back to the prison farm, explained that he would rather do forced labor "than live with that woman."

The Road to Reform. In Columbus, Ohio, arraigned for drunkenness, Sam Keaton, 66, asked the judge not to jail him, was fined only $10 and costs after declaring: "If you let me out, I'm going to take a good big drink, have a bath, and go to bed."

The Hasty Heart. In Kingston, Jamaica, impatient because his fiancee's illness had delayed their marriage, Attorney Justin Colin forced his way into the hospital, rushed his prospective bride to his car, sped 60 miles to Mandeville for a quick wedding, seven hours later was arrested on an assault charge.

That Fatal Scent. In Portland, Ore., Jerry Tisi, 24, a Navajo Indian, climbed through Patience Baxter's apartment window, found and drank a bottle of cologne, was lying unconscious on a bed when police arrived.

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