Monday, Apr. 10, 1950

Miscellany

King's X. In El Paso, Frederico Taron denied an assault charge by explaining: "I didn't hit anybody but my wife."

Own Back Yard. In Muscatine. Iowa, police searched high & low for William Newsander, charged with desertion from the Air Force, found him at the annual Policemen's ball.

The Last Straw. In Pittsburgh, after 21-year-old Donald McGouldrick had broken in for the seventh time to take or break $500 worth of merchandise. Willie & Sammy's bargain variety store closed out in a "We Quit" sale.

Reprieve. In Boston. Clerk Lawrence R. Grode of the Massachusetts House of Representatives breathed easier after legislators killed a bill to regulate the waters of Lake Chargoggagoggmanchauggagogg- chaubunagungamaug.

Prophet. In Eaton, Ohio. Prisoner John Emerson Ballinger tipped off county officers to a planned jailbreak, made his escape while they investigated.

Overhead. In Albany, N.Y., a storekeeper got a federal income tax deduction for "Food for kittens to catch the mouses in the store."

Nothing Sacred. In Philadelphia, Policewoman Sylvia di Renzo called the cops to report that while she was in a beauty parlor a thief had made off with her badge, whistle and call-box key.

Emergency. In seaside Beeston Regis, England, parishioners petitioned the council to start a fund for moving the church inland before the sea washes it away, a date set by erosion experts at 2192 A.D.

Capital Gains. In Cleveland. Richard L. Mahan was charged with passing a bad check written on a new $25 check-writing machine which he had bought with a bad check.

Credit Risk. In Los Angeles, Mrs. Josefa Dominguez, 40. demanded maintenance for herself and ten children from her common law husband, who wanted more children when he had "not paid the doctor for the last three."

Dealer's Choice. In Albany, N.Y., Joseph Padersky, charged with arson, admitted he had burned the building because he had always had bad luck at poker there.

Boomerang. In Manhattan. Mrs. Evelyn Lanier, who shot down Gunman Thomas Wright when he tried to hold up her mother's grocery, was a heroine until detectives found that they had to book her for doing the shooting with an unlicensed pistol once stolen from the police.

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