Rankypanky

The June Screen Writer cracked out with a parody by Screenwriter I. A. L. Diamond, which tells the story of J. Arthur Rank's second visit to Hollywood as Lewis Carroll might have told it:

'Twas ciros, and the cinelords

Were lolly par sing with their babes:

All goldwyns were acadawards

But demille ruled the nabes.

"Beware the Jarthurank, my lad!

The lion's claw, the eagle's wing!

And when U-I his pix, be glad

That DOS dos everything!"

He took his Johnston code in hand:

Long time the ranksome foe he sought --

So rested he by the schary tree,

And stood awhile in thought.

And as in quota-quotes he stood,

The Jarthurank, of happy breed,

Came boulting through the korda wood,

And caroled on his reed!

For sin! For shame! On cleavaged dame

The censor shears went flicker-flack!

He scarred the Bard, and coward marred

Went gallupolling back.

"And hast thou haysed the Jarthurank?

Come to my arms, my breenish boy!

O date and day! Elate! L.A.!"

He xenophobed with joy.

'Twas ciros, and the cinelords

Were lolly par sing with their babes:

All goldwyns were acadawards,

But demille ruled the nabes.

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