Whoopsidoodle. In Brooklyn, Margaret King's 18-year-old white rabbit, Bonsi Doodle, charged around her apartment going "Whoop! Whoop!" so loudly that Neighbor Robert Yetman couldn't take it, was haled into court by Owner King for abusive language.

Bed & Bored. In London, a social worker asked 400 couples why they married, found that most of the men did it to escape rooming-house living.

Old Score. In Goose Creek, Tex., Draft Board Chairman Frank Read complained that Veteran Albert Hill, inducted in April, 1942, had finally caught up with him, busted in his false teeth.

Men's Dept. In Manhattan, the Men's Fashion Guild happily predicted that yellow pants, for spring, would make men less tense, less neurotic.

Solicitude. In Salt Lake City, a woman bus-rider accidentally smudged a man's coat with lipstick, later called the Deseret News, asked them to explain the whole thing because he seemed "such a nice man" and she would hate to break up his family.

Shirt-Consumer. In Cambridge, Mass., a Harvard professor, to pay off a bet, ate his shirt after dissolving it in acid, neutralizing the acid, filtering out the precipitate, spreading it on bread.

The Boss Is Wrong. In Ottawa, Hume Wright, new man in the Department of External Affairs, reported to his cousin, Under Secretary Hume Wrong.

Leave Him to Heaven. In Oklahoma City, Bible-reading Isaac Coker, annoyed by the "rantin' religion" of a next-door prayer meeting, blazed away with a shotgun, wounded the preacher, who refused to prosecute Coker, since "the Lord will punish him."

Slippery. In Houston, small-boned Frank Mullins told how last June he broke out of his death cell in Edinburgh jail: he dieted, greased himself with nose salve, slithered through a 12-inch hole and an 18-inch drainpipe.

Pie-Eyed. In Baltimore, Erranger Trogdon's horse went on a tear, skidded into a confectionery store, fell, philosophically lay on the floor, ate three pies.

Woman's World. In San Diego Municipal Court, chic and spotless Mrs. Luther Shipman charged scratched and battered Luther Shipman with assault & battery.

Last Twist. In Lancaster, Pa., Mrs. David Norcross twice threw her wrestler husband, then divorced him.

This file is automatically generated by a robot program, so reader's discretion is required.