Monday, May. 14, 1945

On the Town. In Boston, police were left holding a bag, forgotten in a taxi by four sailors. Its contents: one dozen pickles, a jar of olives, a box of crackers, three frankfurters, a copy of Good Night, Sweet Prince, the life & loves of John Barrymore.

Going My Way. In Chicago, OPA closed in on Laundryman Chow Yew, who advertised: "The OPA way for 16-c-, my way for 18-c-."

Down to Earth. In Manhattan, a hard-pressed butcher set out a sign : "What Have I Got? I Got Cow's Feet."

Stingers. In Lewiston, Idaho,Apiarist W. H. Bristol fed his young bees a concoction of sulfathiazole and syrup, fondly hoped their sting might now be antiseptic.

Tooth & Nailed. In Manhattan, police arrested one Tom Collins, whose false teeth were found inside a looted shop while he stood outside, innocently watching the investigation.

Habeas Corpus. In St. Louis, Mortician August Kron Jr. confessed to police that "relatives would not put out the money for the funeral," led them to the basement where the embalmed body of a woman had lain in an open wooden casket for 40 years.

Occupational Hazard. In Seattle, Remi C. Delay, fed up with the kidding he got in line of duty as a bus driver, petitioned to change his name to DeLoy.

The Tender Passion. In Niagara Falls, N.Y., Roosevelt Posey beat up a woman on the street whom he mistook for his missing wife, was bailed out of jail by Mrs. Posey, who suddenly turned up and explained happily, "That proves he loves me."

Long Remember. In Harrisburg, Pa., the State Legislature entertained a resolution to give back to the South all Confederate flags captured during the Civil War. In Washington, the U.S. Senate voted that regiments dating back to the Civil War might carry in battle the Confederate stars & bars as well as the U.S. stars & stripes.

Irresistible. In Tacoma, Wash., handsome Policeman Patrick O'Malley, walking his beat, was hugged by a pretty, impulsive blonde, dutifully had her fined $15 and costs for disorderly conduct.

How to Be Alone. In El Paso, transcontinental Hitchhiker Sam Henderson complained that few cars were giving him lifts--on account of both the gas shortage and the three live rattlers and three gila monsters included in his baggage.

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