Monday, Mar. 09, 1931

in the Play

"so THIS is LIFE''

Cast of Characters

(in order of Their Appearance)

PROUD PAPA ELLIOT WESTIN*

HAPPY MAMMA HARRIET WESTIN

THE HERO

THE NEW ARRIVAL AVRAM

HEAD OF THE HOUSE I ROBERT

THE DUKE WESTIN

IT HIMSELF

THE KID HIMSELF

*Singer, Floorwalker, Bottlecarrier

TIME: 9:15 A.M., July 29, 1929 NOTICE: AVRAM R. will appear exclusively at the WESTIN THEATRE. Don't Miss the Midnight Performance.

It's a Continuous SCREAM!

THE BIRTH OF THE MONTH CLUB

Announces

Its selection for January "JOHN LEON, in"

by Martha and John LeMaster

This is the first of this young couple's work and is an interesting study of what can be done when you really try. It is a new version of a book, which for generations has held universal interest. Indispensable to the specialist, and fascinating to the general reader.

Published and delivered by

General Hospital & Co.

February 3, 1931

Weight, 7 Ibs.

Original Copy

on display at

3335 N. Broadway

New Orleans, La.

MARY ANNE RICHMOND

Series "A," NONCONVERTIBLE GIRL, Preferred as to assets and liabilities

Dated Dec. 27, 1930 Public Offering Jan. 10, 1931 Interest commencing Dec. 27, 1930, and steadily increasing toward maturity. Non-callable for a few years. Free from taxes by Railroad, Steamship and Street Car Companies until 1936. REGISTRAR: Bureau of Vital Statistics,

Hillsboro, Mo.

*The following information is furnished by the house of origination after consulting with specialists who had charge of production and who have made a thorough examination of property. . . .

MAINTENANCE AND IMPROVEMENT FUND

It is estimated that PLENTY of the Gross income of the Company will be required to get this issue on its feet, after which a sinking fund will be established on the straight line method for IMPROVEMENT AND EXPANSION, also for OBSOLESCENCE.

RESTRICTION AS TO ADDITIONAL ISSUES Series "A" will be maintained under all conditions, but additional series may be brought out in accordance with the TRUST IN NATURE.

INSURANCE

Tornado and Flood Insurance have been taken out to protect the holders of this issue.

(etc. etc. etc.)

HELEN and DICK RICHMOND, Untd. 5916 Washington Ave., 411 Olive St.,

St. Louis, Mo. St. Louis, Mo.

Tel. CAbany 4693 Tel. CHestnut 8835

*In the opinion of Council, this issue is an asset as regards State and Federal Income Taxes. The statements, made herein, are based on information which we are informed was obtained from sources which we hope are reliable.

Astonished, TIME acknowledges receipt of dozens of variants of the above; also dozens of other birth-announcements which it does not reproduce because the point lies mainly in illustration or strange typography. Mention-worthy are:

A pen-&-ink of a theatre front with electric lights announcing ROGER CONANT-- First appearance in "LIFE."

A vest-pocket three-column newspaper complete with headlines such as "Baby to be President of Country says father" (for David Van Camp, Son of the Akron Times-Press' Sunday Editor).

Similarly, the Stork Tribune, for Elizabeth Ann Miller of Spencer, W. Va.

Robert Jackson Lambdin sketched with boxing gloves, leaning back nonchalant against the ropes of his "corner"--his "main bout [having] ended 12.55 pm. . ."

Baby Jules Louis Furth pictured in a parachute descent; etc, etc, etc.

Most elaborately constructed were legalistic financial advertisements (Par Value of James Whitney Goit was stated to be $1,000,000), a merchandise receipt (rendered on the New York Stork Exchange for Jill Susan Kahn), and announcements of literary, theatrical or musical productions (Jean Charlotte Steel, "world's greatest eight and three quarters pound coloratura" promising "continuous performance") .--ED.

Phi Gamma Delta Sirs:

Proposal for TIME'S encyclopedia of unique methods of announcing visits of the stork:

The magazine of the Phi Gamma Delta fraternity (alumni: Calvin Coolidge, Newton D. Baker, Thomas R. Marshall, Charles Warren Fairbanks, Lew Wallace, Meredith Nicholson, Christy Mathewson, and Rockwell Kent) has a heading for the roster of the marriages of the brethren which reads: MERGERS.

In the same department the births are captioned: DIVIDEND NOTICES.

JNO. J. REINHARD

Washington, D. C.

Huey Long's "P"

Sir THE CORRECT MIDDLE NAME OF GOVERNOR SENATOR DOCTOR HUEY P LONG IS PIERCE AND SENATOR NOT DOCTOR PARHAM HUEY P (TIME, Feb. LONG 16). THE LOUISIANA PROGRESS

New Orleans, La.

No available records show Senator Long's middle name. He says it is neither Pierce, Pearce nor Parham, but Polycarpe. Most interested Louisianans prefer Parham.--ED.

TIME to Bed

Sirs:

Your valuable publication has undoubtedly been put to a lot of uses, but I believe it has a novel one in my home.

I have a three-year-old daughter who insists on taking it to bed with her every afternoon for her nap, in place of a doll.

HERBERT JOHNSON

New Zealand Insurance Co., Ltd. Denver, Colo.

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