Tanker Jack

An ornate person is the Vice-Chamberlain of Great Britain. He helps with the domestic accounts of the Royal Household, carries a long white wand on formal occasions, wears a symbolic golden key, presents to the King-Emperor a daily account of the doings of Parliament while it is in session. Present Vice-Chamberlain of Britain is burly Jack Hayes, Laborite, one-time heavyweight boxer, onetime metropolitan policeman. More than most Laborite factotums of the Court he is irked by his gaudy trappings. Occasionally he rebels. Last month an oil tanker hove back to England's shore from a Mediterranean cruise and out upon the dock stepped Vice-Chamberlain & Mrs. Hayes with their daughter.

"I have seen a good many explanations," said the Vice-Chamberlain jovially, "as to why we took my vacation on a tanker instead of a liner. They were all of them wrong. The truth is very simple. I knew in an oil tanker we would find peace and quiet and good sailing conditions.

"To loll on the deck of a tanker, coatless, hatless, collarless, vestless, and with no photographers about--ah boys! that is an ideal holiday for a politician. Most people think of a tanker as a dirty old tub. It is nothing of the sort. The food is excellent, and the sleeping accommodations as good as on any liner."