Hush Stuff

Recurring like seven year locusts are Canadian rumors of U. S. annexation or invasion of Canada. Last week a struggling, as-yet-unsuppressed Toronto scandal-sheet, Hush, "The Newspaper with a Heart," published the following:

"The United States today is a cosmopolitan nation. . . . Citizens of true Anglo-Saxon origin are in meagre minority. During the last 60 years the millions of emigrants from Central Europe, Poles, Slavs, Italians, Sicilians, Jews, Russians, and the Danes, Finns and Swedes, have brought with them into their new home all of Continental Europe's age-old hatred of England. . . .

"The eyes of the People of the U. S. are turned longingly towards Canada and her gigantic unexplored natural resources and their hearts are filled with envy and covetousness, . . . after terrific economic pressure our neighbor now plans the actual conquest of Canada, and waits but the hour to strike! . . .

"The United States has, using Military aeroplanes, from Selfridge Field, Mich., and other military airports, . . . photographed, mapped and plotted for military purposes, practically every foot of the peninsula of Ontario and the settled portions of Quebec. . . . "Andrew Mellen [sic], Treasurere of the United States [sic], ... is manufacturing and has in storage terrific supplies of poison and irritating gases for military purposes. . . . "Naval armament for the immediate conversions of steel freighters in the Great Lakes into ships of war is in storage in Cleveland, Detroit, Chicago and Duluth. . . . Inordinate supplies of uniforms . . . are in storage in the military posts of the United States Army. . . .

"Consequently as a purely defensive move, disregarding any support which might be expected from other nations of the British Empire, Canada should IMMEDIATELY proceed to negotiate an offensive and defensive alliance with Mexico and Japan! . . .

"Remember that the gentlemen who warned England about the German menace were laughed to scorn!"

This dire plan for the conquest of Canada was not the only secret information which the newspaper with a Heart discovered last week. This other warning was printed on the front page:

"If the little party planned for the St. Catherine's Horse Show have made their reservations at Niagara Falls, be careful! One of your wives is ON!"

An actual attempt at U. S. annexation was reported last week from Saskatoon, Saskatchewan. Objecting to a lecture delivered by Miss Eileen Fields, their teacher, pupils in the Pike Lake School lustily shouted: "Down with the English!" They pasted on the blackboard a print of the U. S. flag, torn from the school's Book of Knowledge. A lad of twelve lowered his head and butted Miss Fields three times in the pit of the stomach.