"Goose?" "Boar?"

An elderly and sweetly commanding lady appeared, last week in the Zoological Gardens at Bristol, where a Conservative party picnic was being held. When reporters crowded round, the lady pinked with amiability. "I was wondering as I entered the Zoo," she said, "in what category I really belong. I am too old to play with the monkeys or quack with the ducks. I do not want to be enrolled among the geese, and still less among the boars. I wonder where I belong."

"Mrs. Baldwin," said a punctilious newsgatherer, "would you favor us with an opinion on some political subject."

Soon obliging Mrs. Stanley Baldwin, beloved and industriously charitable wife of the Prime Minister, produced a broadly political and deeply feminine opinion: "A woman Labor leader at Bournemouth declared, the other day, that the Socialist party is out for power. I fancy that we Conservative women want something which is higher than power. We want peace and goodwill, and we shall never get it from a party that preaches power and warfare."

Socialists failed to comprehend Mrs. Baldwin. They know, as everyone knows, that the Conservative party is historically belligerent and imperialist, while the Socialist or Labor party is pacifist.