Had they been interviewed, some people who figured in last week's news might have related certain of their doings as follows:

Mrs. Theodore Roosevelt: "Many a distinguished lady and gentleman made the annual pilgrimage to my husband's tomb at Oyster Bay, L. I., on the eighth anniversary of his death, last week. Congressman Hamilton Fish simultaneously lauded him in the House of Representatives, and the trustees of the New York State Roosevelt Memorial reported to the New York Legislature, outlining final plans for a memorial wing at the American Museum of Natural History and asking for $700,000 of the $2,500,000 appropriated for its erection."

Theodore Roosevelt: "My brother, Kermit, lost his left thumb when, last week, a Manhattan surgeon amputated it to rid him of a persistent infection. The infection was apparently the result of radium treatment which my brother underwent six years ago to remove from his left thumb a wart."

Kermit Roosevelt: "My brother, Archie, was robbed of some of his distinction as a hunter of big game when, last week, it was reported that Hunter Stanley R. Graham of Chicago had returned with four pumas from the Princon Mountains, Ariz., where my brother hunted but bagged naught."

Archie Roosevelt: "My brothers, Theodore and Kermit, were robbed of their unique distinction as hunters of ovis poli when, last week, an expedition for the American Museum of Natural History, under William J. Morden and James L. Clark, cabled from Peking its return from Tibet and Turkestan with enough of the creatures to make a large family group. The despatch said ovis poli were 'not so rare'; reported that the natives slaughter them wholesale for meat; reported seeing 33 in one herd. . . . My brother, Theodore, was active last week making speeches in his native state (New York), on military economy (which he at- tacked) and migration to farms (which he advocated)."

James Rowland Angell, President of Yale: "Lately, Director Richard Swann Lull of our university's Peabody Museum received a telegram from Texas saying that Old Bill, 22-year-old, 2,500-pound Asian armored rhinoceros, worth $30,000, had died very suddenly. Professor Lull, quick to reply, told Old Bill's owners, the Ringling Brothers Circus, that he would be glad to have them stand by an agreement made years ago by the late P. T. Barnum and renewed by the Ringlings when they bought out Mr. Barnum, that the corpses of their rare animals should come to the Peabody Museum. Last week the Museum announced that Old Bill's hide was in Manhattan being tanned, that his skeleton was in New Haven. Two Peabody exhibits will be made of Old Bill, the skeleton and a papier mache rhinoceros wearing Old Bill's hide. They will be placed beside Old Bill's onetime companion of circus days, Fatima, 2,000-pound mare hippopotamus."

William Mann Irvine, Headmaster, Mercersburg Academy: "My school (TIME, July 21, 1924) last week lost by midnight fire its main building, famed old Marshall Hall, built in 1846 as the original building of Marshall College. One hundred fifty students rushed out, mostly in pajamas; they lost most of their belongings, and the school's loss, fortunately covered by insurance, was $300,000. Presi- dent Coolidge's two sons once sat in classes in the building. Class- room work will be interrupted for perhaps two weeks."

Rufus Daniel Isaacs, Marquess of Reading: "The Anderson Galleries, Manhattan, last week exhibited the furnishings of my London house, which are shortly to be auctioned. I sell because I desire a different interior decoration, and commentators thought that something more unified might indeed be desirable-- for the pieces include Windsor, Hepplewhite, Sheraton and Chippendale, Queen Anne, Cromwellian and Georgian specimens, to say nothing of a neo-Greek table of 1790, in two parts."

Ralph ("Moon") Baker, all-American halfback: "En route to gymnasium last week from my fraternity house, Phi Kappa Pi, at Northwestern University, Evanston, Ill., I heard screams. Clinging to a Lake Michigan pier pillar, her body half submerged in icy water, was Althea Levere, eight, who had fallen in while playing. I waded in; carried her ashore."

Harry Means Crooks, President of Alma College:*" 'Women are almost entirely responsible for the success of the immoral sex novel,' said I bravely last week, before the Women's Club of Highland Park, Mich., Detroit suburb. 'A novel of that sort always has five to twenty more feminine than masculine readers. But,' I added, 'books of the Sunday School library and the dime novel type are certainly immoral.' Commentators recalled Joseph Hergesheimer's saucy address at Yale a few years ago: The Feminine Nuisance in Literature."

Eugene Brieux, author of Damaged Goods and Under Fire, Member of the French Academy: "Said I to a U. S. correspondent last week: 'I pity the American woman very much. . . . Your men . . . they are not what they should be.... They do not know how to love women completely--with body, soul and heart. Therefore, it is natural that the women of America should be restless and so they search and try to live for themselves--to have "careers". ... I am glad that our women do not take that road. . . . Woman is made for conception. . . . Oui, sa destinee c'est la maternite.' "

Laura Volstead, the one ewe lamb of famed Andrew J. Volstead: "Much of my adult life has been spent in Washington helping my father; my official (voting) residence is still Granite Falls, Minn.; I have lived in St. Paul for only 18 months; nevertheless, the Women's Republican Club of St. Paul elected me president last week, after heated parliamentary squabble. Forthwith, I announced I would change my voting place to St. Paul."

Sultan of Sulu, Philippine potentate: "Despite my recent o position (TIME, June 21), the marriage of my daughter, Tarhata Kiram, with Datu Tahil, local dignitary is fulfilled. Tarhata, graduate of the University of Illinois, has given up her bobbed hair and rolled stockings. She entered Datu Tahil's harem as his fourth wife; Mohammedan law allows no greater number."

John J. Mitchell, potent Chicago banker: "Last week I welcomed to the directorate of my bank, the Illinois Merchants' Trust Co., William H. Mitchell (investment securities), the first of my three sons to be so honored; two other directors elected were Eugene M. Stevens, vice president of the bank; Charles W. Nash, President, Nash Motors Co."

The Rev. Dr. Bernard Iddings Bell, President of St. Stephen's College (Episcopalian): "The trustees of our .college issued a statement that the need for a college in the lower Hudson Valley, and for a country residence college near Manhattan, a college free from conformity to stereotyped pedagogy, was so strongly felt that St. Stephen's (Annandale-on-Hudson) would now be doubled in size if two millions could be raised. If doubled, St. Stephen's would have a student body of 250 men. Preference would no longer be given to members of its special patron, the Episcopal Church."

Paul von Hindenburg, President of Germany: "London telephones to New York. Oslo telephones to Geneva. Berlin telephones to Vienna, but only by way of Czechoslovakia until last week, when I officially opened the first direct Berlin-Vienna telephone cable by a short talk with President Michael Hainisch of Austria."

Paul Poiret, .plump Parisian dressmaker: "I last week went on a theatrical barnstorming tour, with my friend 'Colette,' naughty-novelist and onetime wife of Publisher-Senator Henry de Jouvenel. We have before appeared together on the boards for a night or two at a time, in sketches of our own composition, and we draw as audience the art world of France, people who, overlooking our middle age, call us 'irrepressible children.' '

Walter ("Uncle Walter") Damrosch, conductor: "Last week when I and the New York Symphony Orchestra gave one of our concerts for children (TIME, Dec. 27), I chatted expansively with the youngsters. Said I: 'When the papers published my resignation ... I had the interesting experience of reading the beautiful obituaries. But what touched me most,' I continued, 'were the hundreds of young people's letters I received begging "dear Uncle Walter" not to give up his children's concerts. 'How could I?' said I. There was great applause."

General Umberto Nobile, polar dirigible engineer: "Undepressed by my contretemps in Davenport, Iowa (TIME, Dec. 20), I last week sailed from San Francisco for Japan, where my assistance has been requested by the Japanese government in supervising the assembling and test flights of a dirigible under construction for the Japanese Navy. At Davenport I had had trouble in lecturing in English; in San Francisco I lectured in Italian."

H. R. H. Edward of Wales: "By a slight departure from accepted evening dress, I last week distressed London young men who follow my fashion-lead. I appeared at a public dinner in tail coat, white tie, but black waistcoat. Discreet inquiry revealed that I was mourning the Emperor of Japan."

David Lloyd George: "'My experience,' said I, last week in London, 'has been that most strong men were great talkers.'"

Stanley Baldwin: "'The Prime Minister's job is the loneliest in the world,' said I last week at Worcester, Eng., '. . . the holder . . . is in the position of the captain of a ship. He must stand on the bridge and possess his soul in patience.' Some of my hearers recalled that Mr. Lloyd George had once likened his own position as Premier to that of a man on a high mountain top, possessing a good view, but chilly."

Mrs. Samuel Insull, onetime Gladys Wallis, actress: "I last week announced a mid-January close for my Repertory Theatre in Chicago, opened last November. I have produced therein two plays. Neither was of any artistic importance. Except on fashionable opening nights, many a seat was empty. Statistics-mongers estimated the loss at $1,000 a day and, with outstanding bills, at $200,000 for the season."

James A. Patten, Chicago "Wheat King*"--: "My wife, Louise, last week rushed into Evanston police headquarters and reported the sudden disappearance of Skippy, her pet Persian cat. Detectives detected indigestion in one of her pet goats."

Curt Taucher, called the "indestructible tenor" of the Metropolitan Opera Company: "I am always having bad luck. On March 11, 1925, I fell through a steam trap used in Siegfried and fell 25 feet onto a concrete floor. A while later I had mastoiditis. And last week in the subway a thief slashed my overcoat while I was hanging on a strap and took away $200."

Bishop Edwin Holt Hughes, Methodist, Chicago: "Gluttony, grouchiness and use of narcotics among ministers I last week deplored in an address to the pastors of my diocese. 'Temptation to use narcotics is especially strong in men who hold, public office,' said I. Then I drew a vivid picture of a gourmand: 'One of the most lamentable cases in the Chicago Diocese at present is of a brilliant young preacher who has become an almost insensate mass because of overeating.' '

Marie Curie, co-discoverer of radium: "Agitation for better pay for professors in France revealed last week that I earn but $1,500 a year."

Adolphe Menjou, cinema gentle-man-villain: "A court action revealed last week that my annual salary is $130,000."

*Presbyterian, co-educational institution of 300 students, founded 1887, at Alma, Mich.

*Born, 1852, in Preeland Corners, Ill., he worked first as country store clerk. In 1902, he made $2,000,000 in a wheat "corner" that forced the grain from $1 to $1.34, then a record achievement, resulting in national activity for regulation of such operations. Of late, retired from grain commission business, he descends but seldom on the pit.