Golfers' Tour

When George Hiram Golfer, U. S. A., goes abroad with his wife, one of two things usually happens. He is a miserable man or she is a miserable woman. In harmonious families a compromise is arranged. He will go with her to the London Museum, the Tower, Simpson's Restaurant and the Cheshire Cheese on the first three days of their week there. She will then traipse around Sunningdale, Walton Heath, Hoylake and Ranelagh, humbly admiring his niblick shots and vocabulary. That divides the misery, and on Sunday they will both be seasick crossing the Channel to drink Parisian champagne and reiterate, "Combien?" He would really have liked to play up in Scotland. She pined to see Italy and ride in a gondola. But they are an understanding couple. They compromise on Paris.

Long acquainted with George Hiram and rather fond of him for his past courtesies, the Cunard Line last week announced a new kind of trip abroad, for him alone. Perhaps, for steamship companies are very understanding, a special trip for Mrs. G. H. will be thought up later. But for the present, her husband is invited to go to Scotland, stay at the best hotels, play any that he chooses of 48 golf courses (riding to and from the links by motor) and return in five weeks, all for a flat sum (unstated in the advertisement). The only extra expenditures he will have will be discretionary incidentals like caddy hire,* new balls, refreshments, etc., etc. The company will warm his golfing cockles. Two such trips have been arranged for by Charles Stewart, Cunard's Boston man, himself a linksman. He has visited all the courses of note that will be used, stubbly St. Andrews, rainy Troon, spacious Gleneagles, lovely Muirfield, and found them universally anxious to welcome George Hiram. One boat will sail May 29, the other June 5.

In addition, individual tours will be arranged for twelve courses in London suburbs. Here the Cunard service is especially valuable. Most Scottish courses are public; any man may pay and play. The greens fees are in shillings. Near London, introduction is essential, the fees in pounds.

*Here discretion is important. Outiside the precincts of St. Andrews, for example, lurk shaggy men offering their caddy services, pouncing on the unwary , extorting (later) avaricious prices. Go to the caddy master always. . . At St. Andrews, watch for aged caddy Hutchison, father of Jock (U. S. Open Chanmpion. 1921).