Din

There is an old saying to the effect that oil and water will not mix--neither will Monarchists and Communists. That fact was amply brought out in the Reichstag on its opening day. The first scene was one of simple, solemn sensation: General Erich von Ludendorff held court, his admirers standing stiffly at attention before him. He drank a glass of beer, shook hands formally with each Monarchy man who was presented to him. Grand Admiral Alfred von Tirpitz tripped timorously into the Reichstag. Photographers tried to "snap" him as he went, but in his well-known genial manner, he dispersed them with a few deft fencing movements of his cane. Then, after everyone had trooped into the Reichstag Chamber, Herr Bock, aged 78, oldest Reichstag member, rang a bell to signify that the second Reichstag of the German Republic was in session for the first time. The Communists evidently felt that this was a signal for celebration, for they broke into a series of discordant yells and ear-splitting howls, which they mellowed by clanking cow bells and blowing whistles. The remaining members of the Reichstag did not help matters by hissing and roaring long and loud, "Throw them out." Neither did Herr Bock diminish the noise one iota by waving his private bell and squeaking "Order! Order!" Finally, everyone had to stop to draw breath. Officials began to call the roll. Everyone waited for the L's and the T's with breath bated and hearts palpitating. The Communists yowled whenever a Communist failed to answer his name, which usually meant that he was in prison; when the name of Prince von Bismarck, grandson of the Iron Chancellor, was called, they replied with: "Woe unto you who are his grandson!" Then came the L's and with them "Ludy's" name. The Communists shouted so loud that they almost frightened themselves--a Herculean effort that made their former exertions appear entirely Lilliputian. Jealous Monarchists screamed "Ein, Zwei, Drei" and thundered a counterblast of shrill hisses. "Ludy," always a perfect gentleman, sat with his arms folded, looking the Communists squarely in the eyes and repeatedly bowing to them, although they were anything but complimentary. His supporters, however, stood by him, and yelled with one mighty voice: "Shame on you, you convicts!" Which was a fine example of homogeneous Kultur. At length courageous Herr Bock's tenacious efforts with his little bell had some effect and the roll-calling was resumed.

"Tirpitz!" The Communists felt bound to show him nautical honors. As one man they rose and focussed a common hiss upon the chin foliage of the Grand Admiral, allegedly in imitation of a sea breeze. But the Grand Admiral was not moved.

After roll-call, business was attempted, but with small success. Herr Bock tinkled his bell, announced that the session was over. Immediately the Communists shrieked the Internationale and Monarchists roared Deutschland Ueber Alles as they left the Chamber.